Before we go ahead with it, a little exercise for all of us. There are questions I am putting forth. I have given my answers to it. I expect you to do the same. Answer it honestly, you do not need to tell your answers to anyone. But be true to yourself about them. Okay, let’s start..
Have you failed in an exam?
Yes I have, once in 9th Grade and twice in national level tests.
Have you disappointed your family, friends, relatives, and any other person you made promise to?
Yes I have, so many times.
Have you fallen from a vehicle? How many times?
I have fallen down so many times that I have lost count.
Did you give up on your hobbies for that one thing you couldn’t accomplish?
I gave up dancing, singing, sketching because I thought I am not good enough.
Have always met the deadlines at work?
No, I have hardly managed to finish my work in the given time.
Are you able to meet all the expectations of every person in and around your life?
I am hardly able to meet mine let alone other people’s expectation.
Do you have failed relationships? With family, friends, partners, etc.
Yes, so many of them.
Did you get lost even after following the road directions given by others?
Oh so many times!
Can you multiply numbers having two or more digits without difficulty?
It takes me an eternity to multiply any number.
Have tripped over or stumbled while walking down the road?
Oh, So many times!
All these things are nothing but small failures that we do not acknowledge. They occur almost everyday with so many of us. And yet we aren’t much bothered or affected. We feel disappointed or hurt for a moment and instantly forget about it. The embarrassment is quickly brushed aside and we move on with life.
So why not do the same with the ‘bigger’ failures of life rather than giving up. Why get affected so uch that it leads us to quit? Why not let them go once and for all? How? You ask.
The only way is acceptance. Acceptance of yourself. Acceptance of you as a human being.
The way you have accepted and then neglected the fact that you gave up your hobbies.
The way you accepted and neglected the fact that you cannot multiply.
The way you accepted that you failed.
Similarly, you accept the emotions – pain, sorrow, hurt. Let these emotions flow over you like a river and allow it to flow past you. And then you let it go.
When you feel the full force of it, it becomes easier to let to. We aren’t scared of letting go. We are scared of feeling the full force of those things that affect us. But only then can you become strong enough to be okay with your failure.
Acceptance. It’s the only way to cope with it.
As they say – Failure is the stepping stone to success.